Elephants and Donkeys Demand End to Mascot Usage

Elephants and Donkeys Demand End to Mascot Usage

In an unprecedented move, elephants and donkeys across the nation have united to demand that political parties, sports teams, and even fast-food chains cease using their likenesses as mascots. The animals argue that their images have been exploited for far too long, and it's time for a change.

Leading the charge is a unique figure known as "Ass Man," a part-man, part-donkey hybrid who has become the face of this movement. Ass Man, whose real name remains a mystery, has been vocal about the need for respect and dignity for all animals.

"We are not your mascots!" declared Ass Man at a recent rally. "For years, we've been used as symbols without our consent. It's time for that to end."

The movement has gained significant traction, with supporters from various animal rights organizations joining the cause. The elephants and donkeys argue that their images have been commercialized and politicized, stripping them of their true identities.

However, Ass Man hinted that there might be room for negotiation. "If I could run for office or be on a sports team, I might reconsider," he said with a wry smile. "Otherwise, no deal."

The statement has sparked a wave of speculation and debate. Could Ass Man be the first non-human candidate for political office? Or perhaps the newest star player on a major sports team? Only time will tell.

In the meantime, the movement continues to grow, with more animals joining the call for an end to their exploitation. As the debate rages on, one thing is clear: the voices of elephants and donkeys are being heard loud and clear.

"Ass Man" trying to get random people informed of the mascot issue.

First documented case where elephants and donkeys worked together to resolve the issue at hand.

These are statues at a park, and we placed a sign in their hands for the sake of this news article.

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